Senator Brett

Step off the Edge, Feel Your Lungs!

TOTD – You’re Not Supposed to Feed the Animals?!

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Thought of the Day – You’re Not Supposed to Feed the Animals?!

by Senator Brett

The other night, while on a first dinner date, we had just finished up the main course when the girl mentioned that she owned two cats, one Tabby and one Siamese. She said that they were her “children” and that both of them were her favorite breeds of cats. Then she asked me what my favorite breed of cat is and if I had ever owned one. To which I replied, “Well, you know, I don’t know. Let me think about it while I’m in the restroom.”

So, I headed to the restroom… but, then I took a quick left and headed straight for the exit door.

Yeah, I know it’s rude, especially when you consider that she would end up with the check. But, here’s how I see it… if she can afford to feed two totally pointless animals then she can afford to buy me one friggin’ steak! I mean, I never even once shed all over her place or made her clothes look like they were forming their own new breed of cat.

And, I think I’m totally justified in leaving because, let’s face it, if I went back to the table and she forced me to answer that question it would have just ended in a drink to my face, a slap to my cheek, and, most likely, a knee to my groin… like most of my dates end.

Anyway, have a good one, folks. And, as always remember… it’s not the sudden stop at the end of the fall that will kill you. It is the lack of Zyrtec and falling in love with pets who withhold their affection, and yet provide nothing at all, that will get you in the end.

Your Friendly Senator


Author: senatorbrett

I guess the best term to describe me is "Tex-Mex... at its best and worst!" I am a native Houstonian who loves all things "sports", Spanish red wines, cooking, hoppy beers, women with low standards, way too much television, watching movies on rainy days and using the term "the cat's pajamas" even when it doesn't make much sense.

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